the timing

I can't help the counting of hours and seeing the tears that are welling and not being let to slip.  She is 11 and full of emotions  and they often conflict.  I feel somewhat guilty at having to go away, but i know that i need to do this.  I need to take care of me to be able to take care of her and her siblings to the best of my abilities.    It is simply hard to have to leave them when I have been the constant for them. This will be good for me and it has been something I have wanted to do since I was 12.  It is scary to realize a dream that has been long dreamed.
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