stuck in the middle of a mind rant

oh how sick i am of being in the middle.  when she wants something and its been told that it isn't happening right now, she goes around him and comes to me as if i am not going to know that he wants stuff a certain way.  esp. at his house.  this isn't my house my name isn't on the lease and why push him when he has already told her he wants boundries and she keeps skipping over them.  and then get up set at me when i suggest she ask him.   granted he is my husband and this is my family but stop for the love of everything green putting me in a position that no matter what i do some one is going to be mad at me.  and why on earth would i want HIM to be the one mad at me?  He is the one i am trying to FIX my relationship with. 

( tense shift.  third is so hard for me so please note the you is not really you unless its you)
how do i go about being blunt and saying i know you love my kids but they are just that MINE and HIS not yours you can't treat them like they are yours.  i know the situation is totally screwed right now and i technically live at your house because im not on the lease here but that doesn't make it ok. and then to tell me i use you.  totally not true and yes i spend most days ( if you count three hours after work a day) here , but that is because my kids are here.  and if i were using you, i wouldn't hang out with you, i wouldn't see if you need anything when im on the way to your house or if i am at the store. 
wanna talk about being used,  im being used to glean information and so you can feel like you have kids.   that doesn't make me feel at all good to even think.   besides did you tell me that i was the one the back burner because he was your friend? 

i am feeling very negative and frustrated and i want to just go over and get all my stuff and live in a box than have to deal with this crap.   i am 31 years old and i want to run away.  running away is for teenagers.  yet the drama that is circulating again ( after only a friggin week of yall talking again) is making me feel like im a teen ager in high school again.

lord please help me handle this in the right way that would show your glory because if i handle it my way it wont go well for anyone.  and please let me go to boot camp already so i can have all of it stop for everyone involved.